How To Talk So Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7

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I can see that you don’t want to hold my hand. It makes your fingers feel squeezed. Let’s solve this problem…” I also liked how the author points out that children are human and are often given commands all day long. The flesh does not like to be commanded all the time, and although I believe children need to learn to obey a parent’s commands, sometimes being playful can make giving a command much more fun.

When praising kids, be specific and describe effort; don’t label the child as good or smart or talented (135-146). Describe positives before negatives (148-149). Avoid praising by comparison (162). Tactics for handling shy kids: prepare the child for what to expect before meeting with new people; have the new people be playful with the child but not demanding; give the child tasks to do instead of pressuring her to be social; don’t label the kid as shy; say to the new people that the child will talk or play when ready (313-315). If a kid won’t say hi, ask the kid to wave instead (317). Kids who are punished through corporal punishment are more likely to misbehave in the future, according to some studies. Of course, in longitudinal studies of those children, it’s hard to know how much personality/self discipline play into these decisions. I feel like shouting from the rooftops! “I’VE FOUND IT! I’VE FINALLY FOUND IT! THE SURVIVAL GUIDE TO PARENTING!” I want to tell every single parent I know about this book. I want everyone’s lives to be easier because of this book. I want this book to help change parenting in people’s homes the way it did for mine. I want others to feel the relief of FINALLY having some answers on what you should really do! You don’t even want to think about visiting your friend another time. You were looking forward to going today!”

I found this next part about punishments and consequences fascinating. They advocate problem-solving over any form of punishment—at all. My little one is too small to know whether or not this works, yet, but I’m really curious to learn more about it.

Giving your co-worker the chance to present their views uninterrupted is important. Let them field their ideas in public or in private conversations. That will give rise to more cooperation. Same deal with kids. Instead of “Don’t leave your mess piled up,” try: “Matthew, think of where you want to store your soccer stuff.” Letting the child fill in the blanks is more likely to create a lasting lesson. 20. When You Talk to Kids Use Rhyme Rules

I love the message of this book and the way it is telling you to communicate etc, that is spot on and helpfulWe’re leaving the library, I can’t afford to have books thrown on the floor.” What could be more valuable than punishment as the average parent? Freaking artificial punishment for actions don’t work either. Do you want to put your pajamas on or brush your teeth first?” “Redshirt or the blue one?” 12. Speak Developmentally Correctly Make a sign that says kitchen open at 7AM so that your child knows not to come into the kitchen until 7AM. Baby 411 is) my go-to reference so I don't bother Charlotte's pediatrician!"—Chelsea Clinton (US Weekly, Sept. 2015). Brainstorm solutions with them. Write down all the suggestions, even the ridiculous ones. Then eliminate the ones that definitely won’t work (“No, we can’t make your sister live in the basement”) until you can come up with a compromise.

This book is broken up into a number of different sections. How the Book is Divided First Section: Basic Tools to Help Parents Cope Making minor mistakes drives perfectionists mad. But perfectionists are rarely the most effective co-workers. As with your kids, little mistakes done playfully can unwire a bias toward ideological thinking and can unleash creativity in others. We don’t want to accept negative feelings because they’re so . . . well . . . negative. We don’t want to give them any power. We want to correct them, diminish them, or preferably make them disappear altogether. Our intuition tells us to push those feelings away as fast and hard as possible. But this is one instance in which our intuition is leading us astray.” Lean into the negative feeling, and work with it, not against it. Kids who get a lot of praise early tend to flounder in middle-school because they’ve done it. They start to think “So what?” When a child has been told that they are good, why would they risk their status to do another worksheet of math problems? If a child has been complimented in a descriptive way, they will proceed and progress. The kids who are told they are smart or bright tend to struggle when they encounter difficult problems. When they struggle, they might fail to rise to the challenge.

Humour is one of the best antidotes to master/slave relationships at work or at home. If you can make your counterparty smile or laugh then you are in a strong position to influence and effect positive change.

Summary of Mission economy: Moonshot guide to changing capitalism by Mariana Mazzucato April 2, 2023 Chapter 2 Tools for Engaging Cooperation … Feelings Schmeelings, She Has to Brush Her Teeth-Getting kids to do what they have to do 43 Children need us to validate their feelings so they can become grown-ups who know who they are and what they feel” (17). Wrong. Generations of kids did not get their feelings validated, and yet they still became adults who knew who they are and what they feel.Think to yourself, the next time I buy a chocolate cake, I’ll put it out of sight until it’s time for dessert. The best way to inspire a child to do better in the future is to give him an opportunity to do better in the present.”