He's Not Lazy: Empowering Your Son to Believe In Himself

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This is the first and only parenting book that was even slightly familiar with what we deal with daily. Overall valid advice for raising any teenager but had some insights and suggestions that are more relevant to teenage boys. When I asked my son to rate himself using a ruler as the book suggests, his response was exactly how the author said it would happen. The parenting lessons in here are equally applicable to parenting girls but the insights are very much ‘what it feels like to be a teenage boy’ so not much help for parents of girls.

He explains why nagging and over-parenting simply exacerbates this issue, and how stepping back and giving boys more autonomy can help them become more self-directed and find their footing. He is an expert on learning disabilities and ADHD and specialises in working with unmotivated teens. I am sure my 12 year old will be very happy now that I will no longer be a walking self-help book giving him advise at every turn, and letting him learn his life-lessons from living his own life.This book gave me some great perspectives of how to view this from my teenage son's perspective, and also how I can be the most loving and supportive parent to him and our daughter during these years. D., is a clinical psychologist with more than 20 years of experience working with children and teens. I wish I’d read it earlier when my son was in elementary or middle school as I would’ve adjusted my approach and response in handling some of his struggles with motivation sooner, but I still appreciated learning several tips that I can begin to implement now.

The ‘could-try-harder’ boy who is too cool, too busy, or too engrossed in his Xbox to put in the hours on his academics. From what I know of teenage development, young people are usually really motivated to learn about stuff that interests them. To calculate the overall star rating and percentage breakdown by star, we don’t use a simple average. Easy to dismissed boy's when they are growing and this book invites you to stop and think about what might be going on for them.As school starts up again it’s important to mention the key study skills which will put your child in the best position to succeed this academic year. Why do they spend endless hours playing video games or glued to their phones and social media sites instead of studying?

But this book didn't address what to do if the child fails, and fails, and fails, and doesn't change his ways. Is this what YOU want for him so YOU can feel good about what a great parent you are or so his achievements can make up for something we wished we did in our own childhoods? There are some really wonderful and wonderfully presented strategies that I will use with students and likely the 16yo in my house. The parents' change in perspective is the most important key; in the process, they will help their sons create self-sufficient, self-regulated plans. Shame is one of the most powerful and negative emotions for teens and can lead to damage in your relationship if you shame him when he already feels overwhelmed and stressed.And I got the message loud and clear to stop rescuing him (though putting that into practice is still a challenge). Additionally, what about our LGBTQ boys that approach their transformation into sexual beings in perhaps a different way?

First half of the book explains your child , so that you actually understand WHY he is behaving like this. I REALLY worry about the impact the rising levels of perfectionism in young people is having on their mental health. If this is your son, then this is the book to help you step back, figure out what’s going on, and get yourself off the treadmill that is sustaining his behaviour. He’s Not Lazy will help you become your son’s ally, as he assumes greater self-confidence and becomes more self-reliant.You can change your choices at any time by visiting Cookie preferences, as described in the Cookie notice. It’s the first one I’ve read in the area of understanding teenage boys that really spoke to me and made sense of this sometimes difficult season for families. And if you fall into what I perceive to be a very narrow strip of the population, you will probably find this a very helpful book. This book is for a C student who's 100% into the consumer culture and expectations of American maleness.