Meant to Be

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It was emotional and complicated and delicate for every single person involved and we were all just trying to do our best for this wonderful little girl.

Nobody batted an eyelid; there was too much paperwork to get through and too many questions to be answered concerning Billie’s wellbeing. For anyone who has ever found themselves facing the unexpected in life - whether that's infertility, adoption, grief or any other personal challenge - this is an uplifting and honest account of finding love in unexpected places, and building your life on your own terms. We gave Billie lunch and dinner and bathed her with her new bath toys and wrapped her in a new pink snuggly towel. Thank you Lisa for being so honest with your experience, this book really helped me and I related to everything she went through with ivf.

The weeks before had been so intense, and we were – and would continue to be – under such watchful eyes. When that began to look too complicated legally and also too expensive, I launched us into adoption, not taking a breath. When the doctor told me this, I had no idea they wouldn’t be able to move the baby to where it was meant to be, that I’d need surgery to have my tube removed. Every time it failed, I felt my body had betrayed me, that I hadn’t looked after that precious embryo well enough.

While the assessments were being carried out by the courts, as well as giving Billie her everyday care, we would be taking her for regular contact visits with her birth mother and monthly ‘looked-after child reviews’ with social services, not to mention being on the receiving end of home visits from social workers and district nurses. An easy listen with a lot of relatable content, but lacked the depth of was looking for in the topic of adoption. I suddenly realised the amount of ‘stuff’ you need with a toddler and I didn’t want to be caught out by not having something crucial with me, especially as this would be the first time everybody had seen us together. Meant to Be: My Journey to Motherhood by Lisa Faulkner is out now in hardback and in paperback on 5th March. But, in the months and years that followed, she discovered that there was more than one way to build a family - and that there is a lot of joy to be found in life's unexpected detours.

Lisa’s words are beautiful and so many sentences could only be truly understood by those who have gone through the same journey. When Lisa Faulkner learned that she wouldn't have biological children, her plans and expectations for her life were derailed. I realised what was most important: to love unconditionally, to nurture and mould, to watch a child grow and flourish. It covers some really powerful topics such as miscarriage and the struggles of those who are trying to have a family.

I hope I have shown her what it is to be in a loving relationship, and that life comes with its rips and tears, but they can be sewn up again. She really needed us, and she needed us to step up to the mark and be the grown-ups and not let her down. One minute she was in a foster home, now she was with us, a different set of people looking after her, yet within the space of a day, things felt almost normal. Lisa's first book was published in 2012 and was a Sunday Times bestseller, and she has subsequently written 3 other cookery books. Lisa takes you on an emotional journey of the challenges she and other couples have faced to become a parent.This book is good for anyone who has been through this, or, equally, for those who haven’t, to gain an understanding of this difficult journey. When cookery author and TV presenter Lisa Faulkner learned that she wouldn’t have biological children, her plans and expectations for her life were derailed. From the moment I heard Lisa talking to Chris Evans on Virgin Radio, I knew I needed to read this book. We recently went to see the film Instant Family, which is about adoption, with a friend who has two adopted children, too. I do believe you are given what you need, although it might not be what you think you want at that time.