The Truth About Chastity: A Tease and Denial Handbook

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I asked my husband to make coffee for us. When he brought in the coffee, he nearly jumped out of the room. She took control right away and asked him to sit down and join us. She asked him questions about the cage and his intentions. She made it clear that he was not to interfere in her marriage in any way. There would be no sexual activity of any kind between them except related to the cage. She also made it clear that her husband did not approve and that my husband would have to respect his feelings and live with the outcome. This is a risky move, of course. However, even with all the negotiations, kink is something that you have to try out for yourself to be able to judge whether you’re a fan or not. Just because one idea seems like a winner in theory, it doesn’t mean you’ll like it when you play it out and vice versa. What we wear affects our psyche. But why we wear it does so too. Wearing a chastity belt can affect our emotions differently depending on the reason that we wear it. Through those emotions, we get a glimpse at the person underneath, and we get to see a small fragment of who they are; the culmination of their nature and their nurture. Regardless of whether others can see them or not, what we wear shows a part of our story. And they say you shouldn’t judge a person by what they wear. But why shouldn’t I judge a book by it’s cover when that’s what the cover is for? This article needs additional citations for verification. Please help improve this article by adding citations to reliable sources. Unsourced material may be challenged and removed. Our aim is to offer high quality products at affordable prices with discreet worldwide delivery. Many chastity belts that we've seen on the market are incredibly expensive and we don't think that's particularly fair, so we do our best to offer the best devices for the lowest prices. All of our products are thoroughly tested to ensure that you receive a safe, quality item that you’re happy to use on a regular basis.

He was now in chastity for much of the time. I noticed an immediate change in him. He was more docile; he was more obedient and listened carefully. He learned not to interrupt me (or his key holder). I got more interested in the device and used it for small humiliations. But he loved humiliation, so it was a mutual feeling. He had to wear the device anytime that I was going on a date regardless of what his key holder allowed. I made it explicit that I would not promise that I would keep his secret from my dates. However, at first I did keep the device secret. That would change later. Similarly to our previous tip, switching sides is important because it gives you the necessary experience. If you have no idea how the other side feels, you’ll never be able to relate to or understand their desires, wants, and ultimate kinks. Only when you fully understand your partner can you give them what they need from you and vice versa. Switching roles is an ideal way to walk a mile in your partner’s shoes. Even if their role isn’t something you’d necessarily enjoy, it will give you an insight into their mind and feelings. Try Chastity Belts and Devices The reason for wearing a chastity belt is fairly simple; it helps you remain celibate. But that isn’t what I am interested in. I want to know why somebody would wear a chastity belt. What motivates them to wear it. And do the psychological effects of wearing one differ depending on your reasoning? From what I’ve been able to gather, there are three reasons why people would choose to wear a chastity belt. Firstly, they desire to remain celibate. Secondly, they are forced to as a form of atonement. And thirdly, they wish to keep themselves from committing adultery.Well, contrary to popular belief your man does not have to be strange or submissive to want to wear a chastity cage for you. The reasons are complex and come down partly to biology (the repeated tease and denial and the long-term wanting to come are the closest he’s ever going to get to a multiple orgasm); and partly to psychology (there’s a thrill in power-exchange for many men… and for many of us women, too, once we realise it’s just harmless fun and nothing to be afraid of). What we wear influences how we act. Wearing clothes that suit us and compliment our style often results in increased levels of confidence and drive. On the other hand, wearing ill-fitting clothes, be it too tight or too loose or clothes that don’t suit the occasion, such as wearing a T-shirt to a wedding, tend to make us shy away from socializing and enforce a negative self-image. Like everything that we wear, chastity belts have a unique influence on our psyche. The question is, what is that influence specifically, and how does it manifest itself?

Many women complain that chastity devices are fun when there is sex involved, such as when I am meeting my date and my husband is caged. It gets into both of our heads and creates a fun dynamic. But what about the rest of the week which is filled with work and commitments? We had some rules to remind ourselves of his role. For instance, I dressed first for work and he remained naked until I left the house. This gave him time to make my coffee, make the bed and do other household chores. The presence of the cage, made this routine a little more lively. He wore the cage to work, the gym, and walking the dog. The keyholder and the chaste person don’t have to be in a close sexual relationship (although that’s often the case). If you’re considering making this a solo adventure, you’ll still need a keyholder, but your relationship with them doesn’t have to be intimate. Seek Outside Counsel A strap-on dildo may be worn by a male to still allow penetrative vaginal sex to the female while denying the male partner the ability to orgasm, and the male then may also wear a chastity device. [5] This is distinct from pegging, as the strap-on in this case replaces the penis of the male. This can be seen as a form of total denial if the strap-on replaces the penis throughout the whole duration of the play, or as a form of teasing if the strap-on is only used during foreplay. In the last case, the strap-on can be used to prolong penetrative sex and thus sexually satisfy the female partner in case the male suffers from premature ejaculation. [6] [7] [8] As a form of control [ edit ]Today, chastity is a fairly common kink that has many layers. Most people know the basics. One partner physically prevents the other from getting sexually aroused or getting any sexual gratification. However, not many know about what chastity lifestyle really is. What’s more, they have no idea how to go about permanent chastity or if that’s even something they’d be interested in. Make sure you've got your keys!'' he says, cheerfully. ''Have a great night. Send my love to … whichever bunch of arch, chain-smoking homosexuals you're on loan to tonight.'' Rose (18 August 2014). "Rose Answers: Premature Ejaculation 101". Pure Pleasure Shop. Archived from the original on 30 August 2018 . Retrieved 31 August 2018. [ unreliable source?]

Women speak the language of clothes. Everything we wear is a sentence, a paragraph, a chapter - or, sometimes, just an exclamation mark. Mistress Thorne has created this simple guide with images to talk you through each stage of the process. 1. Safety precautions Reagene, Dominic Paul (2014). BDSM & Fetish Dictionary of Kink, 2nd Edition. New York: Muze Management Publishing. p.82. ISBN 978-1-5070-3399-9. Also, remember that consent is key and there are several health issues to be aware of – if it needs to come off, it needs to come off. Edging/tease and denial As noted in the first part of this post, a keyholder can be anyone as long as that person consents to fill the role. Most commonly for men in relationships, it is the caged male’s wife or intimate partner. A guy not in a relationship doesn’t have this built-in option. That can make finding a keyholder at least somewhat more challenging. But it is not impossible. Chastity For Lust And The Fun Of It AllYou’ll find your man wearing a chastity cage will make him more loving and communicative, and more willing to help around the house. And he’ll do this not because he’s necessarily feeling submissive, but because his feelings will make him close to you, and people who are close like to do nice things for each other, don’t they? Not everyone wears a chastity belt out of personal desire or punishment. Some wear it out of love for their partners. In the high-speed world that we live in, it’s possible to be married to someone on the other side of the earth. The great distance limits the chances for physical intimacy, so, a loyal spouse will wear a chastity belt to avoid acting on any sexual urges in their partner's absence. While others might feel shame or calm, these people must feel invigorated. They wear their chastity belts as a reminder of their love and loyalty and it must fill them with determination to have a happy and healthy relationship. Finally I want to highlight the psychological impact of chastity on the person that doesn’t wear the cage. As a keyholder (the person that keeps the key to someone’s chastity device) there are expectations and pressures that many won’t consider. You hold the key to someone’s happiness and enjoyment in your hands. In my relationship I know the commitment it takes taking on my role and I accept that with pleasure, but for others that dedication might be too much to handle. Know your limits and communicate openly, otherwise you’ll likely fail.” Professional Dommes are similar to professional dominatrices regarding the kind of services they offer. They, too, can be on the expensive side, but not usually as expensive as a professional dominatrix. Again, in larger cities, you may find them locally. Also, there are many of them online. Some charge per hour for sessions like their dominatrix sisters, but some offer basic enforced chastity keyholding services at a standard weekly rate. I’ve used one such online service, which was very reasonable in price. Hsieh, Carina; Varina, Rachel (31 July 2019). "Everything You Need to Know About Ruined Orgasms". Cosmopolitan. Archived from the original on 10 October 2019 . Retrieved 17 September 2019.

You don’t have to be cruel, and you certainly don’t have to listen to anyone tell you ‘you shouldn’t let him cum’. I never understood that as a working practice anyway. I believe having a “lifestyle” keyholder, a platonic friend or ex-girlfriend, is the best option, and not only because it’s free. I think it is just a better experience, closer to what men in relationships enjoy from having a wife or partner as their keyholder. But, if that’s not an option for you, there are professional ladies out there willing to hold your keys for a fee. Chastity cages are typically exactly the name suggests: a more-or-less penis-shaped cage, made form plastic or metal, that completely encloses his penis so he can’t stimulate it enough to have an orgasm. Unlike a chastity belt, a cage is usually held in place by a ring that goes around the scrotum and base of the penis behind the testicles themselves. Bondage techniques are commonly used to restrain the person being sexually denied, allowing them to experience their powerlessness more intensely. [2] This practice is typically called "tie and tease" and can be thought of as extended tease and denial games. This practice is often an integral part of sexual denial. In discussions between BDSM partners, negotiation usually focuses on the activities which may or may not be agreed to. Tie and tease activities are physically as well as psychologically intense, because the strong feelings of sexual frustration are escalated by the sensation of helplessness induced by bondage. Tease and denial is a situation where a person is stimulated until they are close to orgasm, then stimulation is stopped, keeping the person on the brink of orgasm. It is sometimes referred to as "edging". [ citation needed] This is similar to orgasm control, but without the promise of orgasm at the end.Savage, Dan (2 June 2017). "Savage Love Letter of the Day: He's Perfect, But a Premie". The Stranger. Archived from the original on 30 August 2018 . Retrieved 31 August 2018. The bottom line is men love to wear a chastity cage, and any man who is wearing one is doing so only because he wants to. The stories you read about men being ‘forced’ to wear then are just that – stories. Plastic ones tend to chafe, and the heavy metallic ones can be a bit too weighty. Be prepared for some trial and error, as well as a bit of moisturiser to help the skin. But when you’ve found one you can wear indefinitely, it’ll be worth it. Chastity devices are an ideal way for partners to tease each other. What’s more, they achieve arousal and orgasm denial, which is the main goal of chastity. It's a top-notch item,'' he says, staring at it. ''Unusual. It's, ah, amazing that 'they' keep coming up with innovative things - even in 2012. That's … got to be good news for the fashion industry!''