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The nurse at the sperm bank asked me if I’d like to masturbate in the cup. I said, “Well, I’m pretty good, but I don’t think I’m ready to compete just yet.” One Sunday, a married couple is in church… When the woman turns to her husband and says, “I just let out a long, silent fart. What should I do?” The husband turned to her and says, “Replace the battery in your hearing aid.” Igor is a SEO specialist, designer, and freelance writer. He believes that knowledge can change the world and be used to inspire and empower young people to build the life of their dreams. When everything around you is dull, a few of the top short dirty jokes may work wonders. What’s 6 inches long, 2 inches broad, and drives ladies insane? That’s one of the short adult jokes. One hundred dollars. Do you know what they do at hooters when you show up for a job interview? They hand you a bra and say, “First, please fill this out, then take a seat”
Jokes are always good as ice breakers. Here are some conversation starter tips that will help you break the ice in any situation My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic. But I refused. If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord. If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can’t have a headache and sex at the same time? That’s so sweet…not! 4. Who are the most dangerous farters in the world? Ninjas. They’re silent but deadly.
Rapid-fire dirty jokes (exclusives!)
Did the sex toy store employee say anything to the customers before closing for the night? There’s no time to waste! It’s time for you to beat it!
What do boobs and toys have in common? They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them. What’s the difference between a Greyhound terminal and a lobster with boobs? One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean. The only thing I can offer to put ladies at ease is that I am of no sexual threat whatsoever. I’m 42 years of age, I literally have to hit it with nettles. Sex with me these days is akin to thumbing marshmallows into the anus of a cat.” – Greg Davies I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies. She is not “fun to be around.”"The husband responds: “One, two, three, four, you, five, six… six total” *** Top-Rated Dirty Joke: Wife Opening the Door in a Bathrobe *** I’ll never look at beef stroganoff the same again! 13. Are you a trampoline? Because I want to bounce on you.
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