Garth Marenghi’s TerrorTome: Dreamweaver, Doomsage, Sunday Times bestseller

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Can he and Roz, his frequently incorrect female editor, hunt down these incarnate denizens of Nick's rampaging imaginata before they destroy Stalkford, outer Stalkford and possibly slightly further? Even people , yes people would cross the road instantly though that may have more to me living next to a busy set of traffic lights. These stories continue with Nick as the protagonist, but deal with an ongoing arc of fighting the demons he directly unleashed from his imagination. Good job I loaded this with silver bullets from that box of silver bullets that was sitting on that table labelled “Silver Bullets” inside the “Silver Bullet’’ room I just entered. If I ceased all alimony payments and sent my ex-wife to live in rented accommodation at her own expense, selling all my daughter’s non-transportable toys, I might just be able to afford it without dipping into any of my own money.

Originally excised from the book and offensive to most readers' sensibilities, it is now boldly reintegrated into the main text of this pleather-bound edition. In my head, I was playing out developments as if part of a series of ‘Darkplace’, which made me smile a lot.I know the joke is centred in Garth's obvious "talent," that or not so much talent, but the biggest joke is having to struggle through almost 300 pages worth of it. Even better is his obvious confusion where he reads out the table of contents and the copyright page. All who criticize or question him will end up dead, usually after a long speech of apology detailing why Garth, err… Nick, was right all along. I initially struggled to find the sweet spot of the rhythm to his writing style which is hand-in-glove with the sardonic, sarcastic, at-times-puerile, clever humour utilised almost constantly.

Eventually, he set off to see where she’d got to, knocked on Strain’s door…then he disappeared, too. Matthew Holness has ruined all books for me because now all I want to read is everything in the style of Garth’s writing. In the show it works, but while I thought 3 short stories would be a breeze to get through, it verges on exhausting/painful with just a few funny moments and while this maybe to show how bad an author the character Marenghi is, the plot was hard to follow at times, that or I just mentally timed out. Garth Marenghi was born in the past, graduated from his local comprehensive (now bulldozed) with some O levels in subjects. I got the audio book read by Garth himself, and I am glad I own it, as his pompous attitude reflects perfectly with the main character.

Garth Marenghi started off as a performance and Matthew Holness really shines as the pompous narcissist.

Legend has it that there was an earlier text (legend is correct, btw); one that contained a story so horrid, so gruesome, that Hodder's initial printing was marked 'To be Pulped' and the manuscript subsequently revised to appeal to a weaker-minded and, frankly, staggeringly ill-informed general public.

Now this shocking, radical, visionary author finally has his chance to shine, excel, surpass, outdo his already prescient work. The explicit descriptions of torture and pain didn't work for me--don't get me wrong, I don't mind explicit descriptions like that, but it was out of kilter with what I was expecting. There was no aroma on earth quite like the smell of a freshly printed paperback, even if ultimately it was the smell of dead trees. More terrifying than an army of unhinged Boners, more sensual than a pair of glistening man-breasts, and more mysterious than a dugong. Back then, with first Fright Knight and then Netherhead – and Darkplace, in due course – Holness wasn’t alone, but working with an estimable gathering of stage talent.