The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self, Third Edition

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Although I'm guessing there are better and more recent books that incorporate the same line of reasoning. if a child is lucky enough to grow up with a mirroring, available mother who is at the child's disposal -- that is, a mother who allows herself to be used as a function of the child's development -- then a healthy self-feeling can gradually develop in the growing child.

Miller presents a solid theory with some difficult truths, but at time the narrowness of her idea turns into a sort of tunnel vision with sweeping generalizations that are far too much. This helps to explain the cult status the original book quickly achieved - because educated middle-class readers could easily find themselves reflected in it. Randolph was a shallow political demagogue whose star briefly crossed the parliamentary firmament in the mid-1880s, when he became Chancellor of the Exchequer and then, within six months, owing to his extraordinarily bad judgment, plunged out of sight.The role of the therapist, according to Miller, is to help the adult rediscover the child in the cellar.

The true opposite of depression is neither gaiety nor absence of pain, but vitality--the freedom to experience spontaneous feelings. By the end of the session, I had made no progress in getting the mother to be sensitive to her daughter’s pressing need to have friends at school. Needing outlets for his own welling adoration, he created images of them as he wished they were, and the less he saw of them, the easier that transformation became.She was a victim of the holocaust and never recovered completely from it as her father died in the Warsaw Ghetto. Alice Miller speaks of the vital importance for us to discover our own personal truth that puts us in touch with our true self. If you can identify yourself as the child, then her work is richly suggestive; but if you come at it as a parent, Miller offers you nothing but guilt and anxiety. Miller references Ingmar Bergman who described in great detail the violent abuse his brother faced at his father's hands, but had no recollection of any mistreatment to himself.

You just have to learn how to confront it head on instead of avoiding it like you’ve been trained to do. I cannot excuse the poor construction of this text, or Miller's failure to adequately support her points or tie together the various threads of her argument. The Drama of The Gifted Child tackles a challenging and emotional subject with unparalleled clarity, grace and aplomb.This is all pretty simplified, the book is brief and well worth reading particularly if you see aspects of yourself or someone you know in the above.

These events from childhood that have become the invisible strings that guide us through our lives are, more often than not, simply accepted by the adult person as a fact that had little to no consequences on their lives. Such parenting can interrupt the bonding process, depriving a young child of the opportunity to feel safe and loved, and ultimately of developing a healthy sense of well-being.She emphasises that it is that child’s emotions that make us often react as we do to the world around our adult selves.